Growing a baby is hard work!

Some women make great pregnant women.  They glow, even when they’re feeling cruddy.  They exude joy and excitement.  They continue with their days with a pep in their step.  They continue all of their regular activities without a hiccup.  I know many ladies that do so even while they are throwing up, as if nothing’s wrong.  And they are able to continue to take care of their family without a problem. They are able to still cook, clean, play, work, and all other duties of being a wife and mother.
I am not one of those women.  I make a cruddy pregnant woman.  Every pregnancy has been hard and they seem to get progressively worse.  It’s hard on me and it’s hard on my family.  Don’t get me wrong:  I feel that EVERY baby is an absolute miracle and we are so grateful for the privilege of bringing a child into the world.  I love the miracle of pregnancy and childbirth.  God has designed an amazing gift in pregnancy and childbirth.  I know that there are so many struggling with infertility.  I know that there are so many that never get the privilege of carrying a child in their womb.  I know firsthand how painful infertility is; we went through two years of infertility before we were able to conceive our first.  That’s a whole other blog post….  Back to the now.  I’m pregnant with our 3rd child.  And it pretty much sucks.  If we were in control, this pregnancy would not be happening now.  This is, in all respects, one of the most difficult times of our lives.  [Again, another blog post.].  While we know HOW pregnancy occurs, we were not trying for this pregnancy.  But God has other plans.  And we are so excited!
The first trimester consists of extreme nausea for me.  Oh, I don’t puke.  So it SEEMS like I’m doing okay.  But the constant, non-stop nausea is awful.  I’ve tried to fight it.  I’ve tried to act like it’s not a big deal.  But then it’s brought to my attention (usually by my sweet husband) that I am non-functional.  So I ask for Zofran.  It helps.  I take it religiously in the first trimester; this time, till 16 weeks along.  But I’m still nauseous pretty much all day and night even while taking the max dose of Zofran.  And I lost weight.  I can’t eat very much or very well when I’m pregnant.  Food just doesn’t go in.  Or drink.  The hydration part is probably the hardest part for me.  It’s so hard for me to stay hydrated, which makes the nausea even worse.  This pregnancy, I would drink approximately a full container of Simply Apple juice every day.  It was the only fluid I could get in.  No other type of apple juice would go in.  Or any other type of liquid for that matter.  But, it did work to counter-act the effects of the Zofran, if you know what I mean.  If you don’t, just know that Zofran ‘slows things down’ massively.  Apple juice in mass quantities speeds things up.  As it turns out, Simply Apple while taking Zofran is a good balance and the one thing that may have worked to my advantage during this pregnancy.  I’m pretty sure the Simply Apple kept me out of the hospital for dehydration.  And the help of my awesome husband making me eat and drink.
I think I have low blood pressure.  I have a family history of generally somewhat low blood pressure; it’s usually considered a good thing, I guess.  But dehydration exacerbates low blood pressure (aka hypotension).  It’s not so low that it’s a medical flag when I go to the doctor and have my blood pressure taken.  It’s usually 90-100/60 ish.  And that’s considered GOOD for a pregnant woman.  Doctors and nurses usually just look for high blood pressure; not low blood pressure.  But I discovered that after I would eat any kind of a decent sized meal (which was rare in the first trimester), I’d feel really, really, really, sleepy.  After reading a little bit, I think that all of my blood was going to process the food and I’d feel a distinct drop in blood pressure everywhere else.  Once I figured that out, I’d be sure to eat and then move as much as possible to keep my blood pressure up.  It didn’t really help much, but I tried.
Of course, with the nausea comes food aversion.  Meat has been on my worst list this entire pregnancy.  It’s gotten better, but I lost a decent amount of weight in the first trimester.  And I honestly didn’t have much to lose (my 2nd was still nursing and she has lots of allergies, so we were both on a restricted diet—great weight loss plan!)  I have not been able to cook for my family in months.  Thankfully, my husband doesn’t mind cooking and has been so great to take care of us.   We took Bradley Method of Childbirth classes when pregnant with our first child and they teach about the BREWER diet.  Yeah, that’s gone out the window.  BLT’s were practically all that would go in during the first trimester.  And then it was EZ Mac N Cheese.  Yeah, that’s healthy!  Ugh.  I KNOW better, but when nothing else goes in, it’s just calories at this point that matter.  My diet is somewhat more varied now that my 2nd is no longer nursing and I can have dairy.  It’s a great way to add calories!  Snickers ice cream bars, here I come!!!!
As for cravings… I want SALT.  Not just salty food. But I want SALT!  I think it’s related to the blood pressure and dehydration and salt helps both.  I asked my doctor about it and she said as long as I’m not craving dirt or laundry detergent, salt is fine.  I eat a lot of salt.  I’ll even pour it in the palm of my hand and eat it that way.  It helped curb the nausea enough to allow me to eat a little bit in the first trimester.
I am exhausted ALL.THE.TIME.  Could be because I have zero appetite and I’m slightly anemic.  Or it could be because I have a 4 year old and an almost 2 year old to take care of.  Or it could be because I’m contracting off and on and have been for weeks now.  Or it could be because I have a very active little boy rolling around inside my belly all the time so sleep is elusive.  Or it could be the pregnancy related insomnia.  Or it could be the indigestion.  Yeah, if it’s not one thing, it’s another.
So if you see me and think “WOW, she’s tiny!  She looks great!” when you ask how far along I am, remember that my doctor is closely monitoring my weight gain to make sure that my baby boy is growing properly.  My baby is within the range of ‘normal’ size.  Same size baby inside this little bump makes breathing quite a difficult task for me.  And I’m measuring consistently a few weeks behind, but growing.  I’ve done this with all three pregnancies now.   I struggle to eat.  It’s a lot of hard work for me to do pretty much EVERYTHING.  And while it’s all fine and dandy that I can still wear non maternity clothes at almost 33 weeks pregnant, it’s not fun, easy, or necessarily good.  I’m accepting it as a positive because it’s just the way it is.  But it’s not easy.  Being pregnant is WORK.  Hard work.